Restaurants Suck

As I mentioned, Frisch’s got rid of yet another thing I enjoyed from there, and they continue to disappoint me, yet I still enjoy going there. One of these days that’s going to change, because I can only take disappointment for so long before I change my ways.

I used to love their Veal Parmesan when I was a kid. That would be the only thing I’d get from there. Then one day we went out as a family to eat and I ordered it. The waitress laughed, then realized I was serious and straightened up. She wrote it down and continued taking orders. When our food came out, I went to eat mine and found the entire meal, plate included, was refrigerator cold. When I told her, she took it in the back, which we were sitting near. A few minutes later I heard a microwave go off and she brought it back out, still almost completely cold except for a slight warm spot in the middle. After that day, they no longer carried Veal Parmesan.

Following that, on three separate occasions at three different locations, I ordered their chili spaghetti. Every one of those times I got it refrigerator cold. I’ve never ordered it again.

And now they’ve gotten rid of their Philly Cheese Steak sandwiches, which I really enjoyed. I’m sorry to say to you all, if you enjoy their salad bar, they’re probably going to get rid of that too, because I like it. I apologize in advance.

Taco Bell used to have a Baja Sauce that I loved, and I’d have them put that shit on everything. Because of this, they decided they should get rid of it, and did.

Years ago, White Castle put out a French Onion Cheeseburger. It was the greatest thing ever. It had a French Onion cheese, as well as French Onion sauce. Oh man. That sauce was so good I could’ve drank it straight from the bottle. I ordered enough of those burgers to make them their best seller. So naturally they got rid of them. They brought them back one time a year later, and that was it. Never again. Recently they brought them back, KIND OF, by just putting the French Onion cheese on the burgers, but no sauce, which was the best part of it, so it was like they were saying “Hey Matt, here’s your favorite burger again! JUST KIDDING! FUCK YOU!”

McDonald’s… oh where to begin. Their McSkillet was the greatest thing of all time. But they got rid of it. Then they had a delicious Southern Chicken Sandwich that they decided to get rid of after I fell in love with it.

I’ve been saying for a long time that they need to come out with a Super Big Mac, because the regular Big Mac has no meat on it. So what did McDonald’s do? They came out with the Grand Mac. Is it what they should’ve put out? NO.

How could they possibly fuck that idea up? Well, what they did was they made everything bigger for the Grand Mac. Bigger bun and bigger meat, except the meat is the same thickness as the regular Big Mac meat, it’s just larger to fill the bigger bun. So in essence, you could order two Big Macs and get the same thing.

All they had to do was make the Grand Mac with things they already had. Just replace the same thin patties they’ve been using for too long with the Quarter Pounder patties. Same buns, same everything, except thicker burgers. And they didn’t have to make anything special for it, like bigger burgers or buns. Now they have to stock new ingredients, like the buns and the patties, both of which can only be used for the Grand Mac. That doesn’t make sense to me, but why would it? Nobody understands what they do except for them.

Because they were on a roll, they not only put out the Grand Mac, but they put out a smaller version of the Big Mac and called it Mac Jr. Awesome! Three different sizes of the Big Mac!

Not pictured: A decent burger.

The best part of it all is, the Mac Jr. and the Grand Mac are for a limited time. Except that if they had made the Grand Mac the way I suggested instead of the moronic way they did, they would be able to make both it and the Mac Jr. any time. Because they would always have those ingredients. That’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever witnessed. Restaurants will have special foods for a limited time, but always have the ingredients to make it, yet won’t make it when it’s not a special item.

Hey, they ALSO have the Mac Snack Wrap! It’s like a Big Mac, but in Snack Wrap form! It’s easy to eat while driving! Just kidding, they got rid of the Mac Snack Wrap too, even though they still have all of the ingredients to make it. Just try ordering one, though. They’ll throw you out and call the police.

Oh yeah, McDonald’s also had cheese sticks, which surprisingly were delicious. But but but… they got rid of those too.

Remember the McSalad Shakers? Basic tossed salads in a cup sized container. You took the lid off, poured your dressing on the salad, put the lid back on, and shook the cup until your salad was covered in dressing. Then you removed the lid again and ate the salad out of the cup. They were awesome. I started eating salad again because I could get a quick one at a drive-thru. Sadly, they didn’t last long.

“Healthy? Or three different sizes of Mac?”

I don’t understand it. Why do they do this? Maybe I’m the only one eating this shit and they’re not selling enough to keep them on the menu. Maybe this is Karma’s way of telling me I need to stop eating so much fast food, which I already know. Maybe I should stop enjoying things and just order the same bland crap every time to make sure I always get what I want, which means I’ll never get what I want, which is how things are now.

Oh yeah, Arby’s recently had a mushroom swiss sandwich that was amazing. They debuted it with another new sandwich. The other new sandwich is permanent. The mushroom sandwich was limited time.

Wendy’s also had a mushroom burger that was really good, on a brioche bun. It was limited time and hasn’t come back.

The core issue here is, they’re all corporations. And corporations are well known for making decisions that are stupid. I think the sub-core issue here is, none of us have any control over any of this, I understand that, and I should let it go. Yet I can’t. Because this is the kind of crap that takes up permanent residence in my head, all the time.

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About Matt Roberts

I am an author of horror and things near it. I enjoy nightmares and bad B horror flicks.
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8 Responses to Restaurants Suck

  1. joey says:

    You poor thing.
    I was gonna say this is like women and discontinued lipstick, but um, I can find that online for a while after…
    I don’t each much fast food. My body doesn’t like it, no matter what they call it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Matt Roberts says:

      Yeah, and honestly I don’t like eating it that much either. It is what it is, I guess. If there could be some place that would sell salads that I could eat on the road, I’d go there constantly. Damn McSalad Shakers…

      Liked by 1 person

      • joey says:

        You know Imma sound like someone’s mom, cause I am, but can’t you just MAKE and take salad?
        I got a nifty bento box for salad. Has a lil container for dressing, a spot to keep your croutons dry… Spill and shake and eat 🙂
        And then, you know, like the whole trendy salad in a jar thingy…
        I can eat very specific things from certain places without feeling lousy. It took a long time to narrow it down, too. 😦

        Liked by 1 person

      • Matt Roberts says:

        Yeah, I could. But that would require going to the store and buying stuff, then preparing it. But because of my schedule, I have broken sleep. The periods in between sleeping, when I’m awake for an hour or two, I’m awake because I have to be, and I don’t feel like going to the store or doing anything. And then because I get broken sleep, the sleep I do get sucks. So I get as much of it as I can, which means I have to rush out the door to do what I have to do, like work. The time I could be shopping and preparing, the stores are closed. Or I could go find a 24 hour store, which is getting harder and harder to find now. I know, there are options, I’m just tired and lazy. The tired thing I could potentially fix, but I’ll always be lazy lol.

        Liked by 2 people

      • joey says:

        I’m sorry about yer sleeps.
        I’m like REALLY into making parfaits with yogurt, berries, and granola. Like HEAVY into it. Jake’s enjoying this trend, too. lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • Matt Roberts says:

        Yeah, that sounds pretty tasty. Mmm.

        Liked by 1 person

      • joey says:

        IT IS. I’ve been eating them pretty much daily for like… 8 months. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Matt Roberts says:

        No problem there. Find something good and good for you, enjoy the hell out of it. If I could ever get on the kick of making salads in advance, I’d probably eat them all the time. I do love salads, I just hate preparing anything lol.

        Like

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