Ubering Tonight

Tonight was not a good night for me. So now you’re going to hear about it. Also, this is going to be a heads up on Uber Eats, for those of you who drive for it or want to, and those of you who use the service.

I started my night by getting called for a ride from the Western Southern Open at 11 pm. Lucky me, when I got there, the place was letting out. The parking lot was just that, except most of the cars were inhabited and on, and nobody was happy.

One guy who was trying to leave was stopped next to me. Someone ahead of him was apparently letting people in front of them, and the guy next to me wasn’t happy about it. He said, “Come on, you can’t let everybody out!”

I thought a few things.

1) If you were one of those cars, you’d be thankful he was letting you out. 2) Based on what you said, you’re the kind of asshole who won’t let anybody out, because where you’re going is more important than where anybody else is going. 3) You attended the same event as everybody else trying to leave. It is literally your fault for the backup. 4) You’re probably the kind of person who speeds down the highway and changes lanes/cuts people off without using your turn signal.

The place was so packed that it took me an hour to get to my rider. After that it was a quick ride down the street about a mile to his hotel. Even with the small surge, I only made $5.56. I told him in all that time he could’ve walked.

Then I had 2 customers in a row no-show on me, so I made $3.75 a piece on them. Woo.

Then I had 2 more rides, which was good. The fun didn’t start until what turned out to be my last run. An Uber Eats order that I got at 1:56 am for McDonald’s.

I don’t know about other cities, but here in Cincinnati, late night Uber Eats orders are almost always from McDonald’s, and of all the ones I’ve taken, only once did I not have to wait more than a couple minutes. That’s including about 2 dozen orders from around 5 or 6 different locations. Usually, since they’re the only ones open late who does Uber Eats, the drive thru is almost always backed up. And since it’s McDonald’s, they’re slow as hell.

Typical wait time for me is easily a half hour or more. Tonight, however, was different.

After getting the call at 1:56, it took about 10 minutes to get to that location. The drive thru line wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t moving. When I finally got to it, I told the guy in the speaker that I was there for Uber Eats.

Later, when I got to the pick up window, they had no idea I was there because the guy didn’t tell them, so the order wasn’t ready. It hadn’t even been started.

I waited at the window, holding up the ever growing line of cars behind me, for around 20 minutes while they got the order ready. In this time I heard two employees arguing inside, and people behind me started honking, as if that would miraculously make McDonald’s faster. Believe me, not even the great magic of Dumbledore could make that happen.

Finally when I got the order and pulled away, it was 2:57 am. One hour since I got the call, and 50 minutes since I pulled into the drive thru.

No sooner than I pulled onto the road, my phone rang. It was Uber Eats. The customer wanted to know what the hell was taking so long. I wanted to say, “They wanted McDonald’s, they should’ve expected this.” But I didn’t.

That’s only the second time I’ve had a customer complain about the wait.

Oh, how much did I make for all that? Less than five dollars.

Uber Eats isn’t so bad during the day. More places are open and taking orders and the wait is almost never long at all. Even McDonald’s is quicker during the day. At least that one time it was for me. But I drive mostly at night, so that’s what I deal with.

On a Friday night I drove for 4 hours and made $31. I called it quits. Stopped to get gas and 2 bottles of pop, and that was $23. So yeah, after working 4 hours I went home with $8.

Happy weekend everyone. 

Live Friday Nights: Green Day – Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)

I have to post another Green Day tune tonight because this Sunday I get to see them live for the first time! I’m pumped. Actually, I’m a little anxious just thinking about being around all those people. I don’t do well around them so much anymore, but I think I’ll be okay. At least I can leave if I have to. And I’ll probably be on substances, God willing. But this will be my first time, and most likely only time, ever seeing Green Day, whom I’ve been a fan of since 93. That’s 24 fucking years. Lord.

Anyway, my buddy Joe, from Saturday Morning Cheap Seats fame, and I, will be going to the show and we’ll most likely be recording a review of it directly after, so I’ll have that posted here if it turns out.

This is a cool live version of this song. Billie Joe has a way of holding an audience in the palm of his hand, as can be seen here. I normally wouldn’t think this could be played with distortion, but he proved me wrong. I think my favorite part of this is the audience singing and clapping along. It’s a very intimate experience that not every concert has.

Terrible Commercials: The Addiction Network

The one problem with watching a small, nothing of a TV station is, the commercials are often very cheap, very annoying, and played constantly because that station is the only one they can afford to advertise on. And the station doesn’t get a lot of traffic, so no bigger names will advertise on it. What you get is three commercial breaks every half hour where you see the same 4 or 5 commercials for years at a time.

Out of those commercials, sometimes, comes one that rules them all. The one that is so terrible, that people love it for being so terrible, so that advertiser thinks the people want more of it, so they make more and more terrible commercials. It is almost a decent show in and of itself, because everybody is always wondering just how bad can they get? Each new installment is met with wide, staring eyes, and bated breath.

That’s how J.G. Wentworth got famous. Not that it’s needed, but I’ll have a post on them one day.

From the very first moment I saw this commercial, I was floored. It only took once. The guy “acting” in this is just phenomenal at being terrible. If overacting got an award, this guy should win it year after year.

YouTube Tuesday – Happy Ending

If I get any later at posting these I’m going to have to start calling them YouTube Wednesdays.

I ended up on what I thought was the wrong side of YouTube. Again. I could tell because the screen shot for all the videos included some kind of young, hot woman barely dressed, and when I clicked on the videos, I had to then click on another link that said I was okay with mature viewing. Keep in mind, I was only trying to see why exactly this was “mature” and on YouTube. If I really wanted to see free porn, I have plenty of sites to go to for that.

When this came up I was more than interested, because I feel like massage parlors that offer “happy endings” are a myth. Not only that, but how would the average person go about finding one of these places? So any time I see a video or a story about these legendary places, I always want to check it out.

Let’s just say with this one, I got my money’s worth. By the way, it is NOT porn.

Social Media Be Damned

I know the world sucks right now, but I don’t want to be inundated with it. Unfortunately, that’s all Facebook and Twitter have become, and those are the two major social media sites I use frequently. I do have a Google+ that I tried to use, but it was boring. I also have a Tumblr, but well, it’s mostly just for porn.

Because negativity pumps up my anxiety, and I’m also completely pissed off almost every time I leave a Facebook session, I’ve decided to drastically limit my time there and on Twitter. I may never go back again, if I can help it.

With that said, I decided to do something about it. Because there are people in my life who I want to keep in touch with, and I’d like to be able to socialize online at the very least, as socializing in person also brings up anxiety. So I created a forum, and this time I’m sticking with it. I experimented in the recent past with a couple others, but they weren’t quite what I was looking for.

So I took this site and made a forum out of it. It’s free to join, if you’re interested, and it’s going to be a place for no bullshit. It’s about having fun, having conversations, posting good and positive stuff, and to keep today’s worldly news out of it. If bitching is your thing as it is mine, I have a separate place there for just that, so that it doesn’t bleed into the good stuff, so that those who want to stay away from the bitching can do so and aren’t smothered by it.

Currently it’s still a work in progress, but it’s more than usable. I just have some small details to work out. Stop by if you like. It’s going to be slow at first, but hopefully it’ll be a place we can go to relax and get away from the crap for a while.

Martians Attack Forum

Live Friday Nights: Robert Randolph – I Don’t Know What You Come To Do

I first discovered Robert Randolph And The Family Band via a local music video TV station. I got up early one morning to go to work and turned it on and it was at the start of the video for their first hit, I Need More Love. I almost turned it, but was immediately drawn into the beat. After it was over, I was hooked. I bought the album it was on and fell in love.

That was back in 2002 or so. And then I saw them on Austin City Limits, which is what the performance below is from. Over the years I’ve followed them and I must say, they’re interesting. They started as a church group and grew from there. They’re all actually related, except the white guy, who they made an official cousin so he could be in the Family Band.

They started playing in jam band festivals and fell into that crowd. Eric Clapton fell in love with them and performed on one of their albums and has had them jam with him in concert.

The only thing I don’t like about them is, they don’t do a lot of singing when live. They sing a lot on their albums, but not live. Other than that, they have a ton of energy, they’re great musicians, and their own songs are really damn good. Even for a “religious” band, and I’m not religious. And their bass player is one of the greatest bass players alive.